Five tips to pack your suitcase and avoid a nervous breakdown

I’ve always felt a certain amount of envy for those eighteenth-century noblewomen who traveled by horse-drawn carriages followed by an embarrassing number of trunks and chests for the journey. Back then it was socially accepted to embark on a trip with twenty different bags for a three-day trip. The world back then was clearly a far more civil place.

But now low-cost airlines (ehm ehm, ryanair) have forced upon us the barbaric custom of measured and weighed luggage, that forces us to a grueling selection of clothes and accessories. How do you leave behind a third pair of navy blue pumps which are so much different from the dark cobalt ones?

Unfortunately we are not rich Russian girls equipped with Vuitton trunks who can be seen outside the Crillion Hotel in Paris, and we are forced to make such strenuous choices.

Hard to be rational but these could be five good tips.


1. Do not imagine apocalyptic scenarios, you are not going on holidays on the Hellmouth of Sunnydale

It’s hard to accept, but that cashmere jumper will hardly come useful during a Caribbean vacation. Much like a pair of heavy-tweed pants. It won’t be cool and fresh. And remember that in the eventuality of an apocalypse, civilization can also be found outside of your city, you can always buy a sweater en loco.

2. Forget your running and exercise gear

You have tainted the world with your performances on Runtastic, but no one believes you’ll actually get up at seven a.m. to run on the beach, you don’t even believe it yourself. I’m guilty of this one, since I packed running shoes for a week-long stay in a resort town, with the intention of exercising

The yoga mat can stay home along with the smartwatch.

3. Do not be too optimistic

I know it’s hard to accept, I know it’s painful, but in Sri Lanka Obama won’t invite you to any black tie events. No Arab sheik will desperately fall in love with you and you’ll get no use out of your “Say yes to the dress” style gown.

4. Do not risk airport dramas

I wonder if security at the Sao Paulo airport is as strict as Ryanair in London?

Better to avoid having to argue with the Kathmandu hostess through hand-gestures because she mistook you for a cargo of goods instead of a passenger. Retain some baggage space for shopping and avoid check-in dramas. Alas, I’ve also made this mistake one too many times.

5.No flat iron, towels, hair dryer or hair curler

Anything that has the mass and size of Jupiter should stay home, because you can do without it. There will probably be a million degrees and you have won’t have time to shower that you’ll already be sweating, so that terri cloth bathrobe from the Alpine spa perhaps could be left behind.

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