There are days when you feel like insulting the world, people and life in general but words never seem appropriate or sufficient.

One of the days with the highest susceptibility rate is Monday, because it carries that ancestral sense of injustice that stems from the weekend.: you sniff 48 hours of freedom but after midnight the carriage turns back to pumpkin and the fairytale is over. Rebel against the system. 

ϟWhen Sylvia Plath wrote Mad Girls Love song it was certainly a Monday. 

If you think I spend hours on Pintrest and tumblr for the sole purpose of finding Louboutins, Chanel bags, furry cats, dream homes, pictures of food and lovely locations then you are so so wrong. 

During my tumblr adventures I stumbled upon a page that generates insults. I’m basically handed curses that I can use against hose people who wreck my head before they even utter a word. 

These are my favorites, fresh meat to utilize on those individuals who even at 7 a.m. Monday morning feel like the MacGyver of the situation. 

◆ I wish you old newspapers to the hairdresser

◆ I wish you out of sync voiceovers

◆ I wish you a Chihuahua and wind gusts to 150 km/h

◆ I wish only closed mussels